Breakfasts and debriefs in Lilongwe

I'd grown used to our group gathering around the breakfast table in the morning, and I wasn’t ready for that to end.

The staff at Damron Suites made us breakfast every morning: fried eggs, sausage, potatoes. We’d make coffee and usually slice up an avocado to spread on toast. And we might have eaten a banana or two. (Fruits just taste better in Malawi!)

Breakfast was our first point in the day to be together. We gathered around a long table in the dining room, poured some coffee to help us function, and then thanked the Lord for the new day. Conversation at breakfast varied. Sometimes we talked about the activities from the day before, or discussed what we were looking forward to. We also spent time verbally processing how we could meet needs that we’d seen. 

"Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not us paper and ink. Instead I hope to come to you and talk face to face, so that our joy may be complete." - 2 John 1:12 ESV

One of the things I loved most about the trip is that I didn’t have cell phone data and I was off most social media platforms. Which meant I was able to genuinely focus on the person in front of me. Breakfast was a special time for us to focus on each other and the day ahead. My joy was truly complete that week with these women and I believe it's because we were "face to face," experiencing life and talking about real, meaningful situations. Breakfast was our time to center ourselves, our hearts, and communicate with the One who was using us to make an impact. 

When we were planning this trip, we had weekly calls to talk about Lilongwe, what to expect, and what our roles would be. One of the things we talked about was starting each day with Jesus and ending each day with a debrief. The goal of the debrief would be to give each of us a chance to process how our day had gone (whether good or hard), and to share what we'd learned.

Our debriefs were my favorite. Breakfast was time for us to re-focus on our purpose, but debrief was time for us to process how that purpose was playing out. Debriefs started out an hour long each night, but by the middle of the week we were up to three hours. We had so much to share!

The time usually started with someone saying, "So, what was the best part of your day?" And then someone else would say, "Well, I had several great moments..." And that would start a cascade of stories. At the beginning of the week, we stuck together and did the same thing, so we heard many of the same conversations. But, as the week progressed and we became more involved, we found ourselves having sidebar conversations with the staff or villagers, observing situations, and picking up on detail that others missed. The more we talked with other people and developed individual relationships, the more we saw our impact growing and God at work.

One of our last nights, it was observed that women in general pay close attention to detail and like to think about many things at once. This was especially noticeable in our debriefs. Our group was picking up on so many things - we identified needs of those around us and possible solutions, we shared conversations that we'd had that gave us more insight into an individual and how God was working in their life, all while also processing how God was working in our own lives. We laughed a lot. And we cried. It was incredible to be together as four women who notice the detail and want to figure out how we can make an impact in each moment. 

"And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father though Him." - Colossians 3:15-17 ESV

I've found myself truly understanding these verses and what it means to be thankful. Not just thankful for material possessions, but thankful for people and relationships. Thankful for experiences that grow me and point me to the Father. Thankful for conversation that goes deep, tears that run long, and laughs that carry a tune. Thankful for aunts and for new friends. Thankful for breakfasts and debriefs.